I've returned to my original design theme, Chuck Noland from Castaway, standing at the cross roads after he'd returned against all odds. In his case, home would never be the same. His return meant that he had discovered the key ingredients to surviving the storms of life.
Perseverance, a belief that there is a good place waiting for you, and a willingness to live low in order to get there. "I had power over nothing. But somehow I knew that I had to stay alive, keep breathing.." It's a metaphor for the wilderness that some of us will go through in this life, if we're lucky. We start with great promise, grand plans, and then the enemy does his work. He comes in and twists, destroys, or stunts the very thing we were made for. His arrows lodge deep in our hearts. Your deepest wounds are taken right in the very place where God had set your truest gift, your strength and glory. However it comes about, we'll see it at as failure, punishment, or curse. We have the Midas touch, and everything we come near dies, or burns, or wastes away. But this is the battlefield. For your heart. Yet the wounds and scars can become beautiful, the beginning of the Blessing. The only place where we can truly discover that we "have power over nothing', and yet are granted the strength to keep living, keep breathing, keep moving. Keep seeking.
I began Cross Roads as a personal blog back in 2004, to document the journey I sensed was unfolding before me. I knew I was approaching an intersection, and was struggling to find the right path forward. Which way? All possible roads looked the same, and I could not see the destination I sought. I had no idea that I'd still be walking through it years later, and that I'd have traveled across such terrain. I now read my earlier posts, and can see glimpses of what has come to be my new reality. This was, and still is, a diary of sorts where I record my thoughts and reflections on events in my life, as well as things in the world around me. I am simply a man who can't contain his thoughts, prone to wander, and not trained in much that I may discuss here.
So, bring your salt shaker, and pull up a chair.
My interests are varied, with a few entries dedicated to subjects such as Orthodoxy, Anglicanism, marriage, body life, etc. With some occasional nonsense mixed in. And all of this absent any particular order, arrangement, or forethought as to subject or timing. It's been more of a free-association exercise than anything else. If you read long enough, you'll see that my view on certain subjects has changed over the years, in some cases very dramatically. I'm not a revisionist historian, so I'm going to let it all stand. To look back and see the change and growth is part of the reason I began to document my journey. To see where I have come from, and to gain a sense of my trajectory. The target I've been aimed at.
My real interest, and focus, is in following Jesus. As I have moved through life, I've heard his call clearly, inescapably, and know that following His call is all that will matter in the end. My hope is that the last half of life will be better focused on hearing and obeying, giving Him room to live here within me.
So I use this place to ask questions, seek answers, and understand how to hear and follow His Spirit better. And that's not something you're meant to do alone.
When I was 26 and my father was 50, he suddenly became a very wise man. Now at 52, I realize how much more wisdom I need to live in light of the life to come. And I feel an urgency about it.
I greatly appreciate your visit, and hope that you will feel comfortable enough to share your thoughts and insights. I'm much more interested in what you've found, have seen, through faith in Jesus than what I might be kicking around here.
May God grant you a spirit of wisdom and revelation as you follow Him!
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